Fun facts about nuns.
Dec. 26th, 2003 09:53 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kageotogiThings I've discovered about nuns so far:
---despite what my brother seems to believe, they do bathe. If not regularly, they at least seem to have a better relationship with water and soap than said bratling wormbaby of doom does.
---television has lied to me again, given that nuns do not fly and it is not because they have "too much in the caboose". A hearty hiss to both The Flying Nun and that one episode of The Simpsons where they go to Brazil!
---the standard black and white penguin ensemble I've learned to associate with nuns is not only not required but also not commonly worn outside of the convent area.
---not all nuns have met the Pope, a realization that, along with the bathing thing, seems to have launched the bratling wormbaby of doom into some random pit of disillusionment. I really don't know who tells him these things.
---being a nun does not automatically grant someone eternal youth, again despite the belief of the bratling wormbaby.
---Sister Isabella, like several of her nun friends, cannot sing or dance, proving that Whoopi Goldberg has managed to mislead both me and the wormbaby yet again. All nuns should not, in fact, be opening acts on Broadway.
---instead of being put into shock by my choice of wardrobe and music, many nuns (such as Sister Isabella) would rather follow me around the house until I locked myself inside my room, agreeing to change and turn off the stereo provided she would just leave me alone, proving that at least some nuns are very persistent.
---having a nun in the house seems to make my parents believe that I should instantly wish to convert back to Christianity. It also means that I've become a prisoner in my own house, given that I'm not allowed to go anywhere until after Sister Isabella and Vincent decide to leave. Which makes me sad, because I really really really want to go over to![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
endaemion's house tonight.
---nuns do not have a curfew. In fact, Sister Isabella seems to like staying up to a later hour than I like to do and even asked me if I would like to stay up late tonight to read with her. o_O
---they do say grace before every meal. Honestly, they do. And it's a little creepy because the grace can last up to thirty-five minutes. Which also led me to the discovery that some nuns have very cold hands. Brrr.
---they seem to uphold the belief that when Jesus walked on water, he was not, in fact, wearing water floaters. He was also not riding upon sea turtles or standing on a raft.
---convents do not have their own seperate gun laws.
---egg nog + nuns seems to be equal to rootbeer + pocky + bagfuls of sugar + me.
---God seems to have a private number, which none of the nuns have put on speed dial. Since Sister Isabella claims that she does not own an address book, I suppose she must have it written down on a napkin, which has been sealed in a glass case complete with a little hammer and the message "break in case of emergency", but by this point Sister Isabella seemed to think I was insane and had stopped answering my questions.
...and the list is still growing. I have nothing against nuns, personally, but I do really wish she would just leave. *cough* Anyway, I hope this information was interesting enough for you, and that maybe you'll put some of it to good use. Which would be nice, since I know I'm never going to use any of the facts I managed to pick up today... In other news, I received a vacuum cleaner for Christmas and was delighted. Does that seem odd to you?
---despite what my brother seems to believe, they do bathe. If not regularly, they at least seem to have a better relationship with water and soap than said bratling wormbaby of doom does.
---television has lied to me again, given that nuns do not fly and it is not because they have "too much in the caboose". A hearty hiss to both The Flying Nun and that one episode of The Simpsons where they go to Brazil!
---the standard black and white penguin ensemble I've learned to associate with nuns is not only not required but also not commonly worn outside of the convent area.
---not all nuns have met the Pope, a realization that, along with the bathing thing, seems to have launched the bratling wormbaby of doom into some random pit of disillusionment. I really don't know who tells him these things.
---being a nun does not automatically grant someone eternal youth, again despite the belief of the bratling wormbaby.
---Sister Isabella, like several of her nun friends, cannot sing or dance, proving that Whoopi Goldberg has managed to mislead both me and the wormbaby yet again. All nuns should not, in fact, be opening acts on Broadway.
---instead of being put into shock by my choice of wardrobe and music, many nuns (such as Sister Isabella) would rather follow me around the house until I locked myself inside my room, agreeing to change and turn off the stereo provided she would just leave me alone, proving that at least some nuns are very persistent.
---having a nun in the house seems to make my parents believe that I should instantly wish to convert back to Christianity. It also means that I've become a prisoner in my own house, given that I'm not allowed to go anywhere until after Sister Isabella and Vincent decide to leave. Which makes me sad, because I really really really want to go over to
endaemion's house tonight.---nuns do not have a curfew. In fact, Sister Isabella seems to like staying up to a later hour than I like to do and even asked me if I would like to stay up late tonight to read with her. o_O
---they do say grace before every meal. Honestly, they do. And it's a little creepy because the grace can last up to thirty-five minutes. Which also led me to the discovery that some nuns have very cold hands. Brrr.
---they seem to uphold the belief that when Jesus walked on water, he was not, in fact, wearing water floaters. He was also not riding upon sea turtles or standing on a raft.
---convents do not have their own seperate gun laws.
---egg nog + nuns seems to be equal to rootbeer + pocky + bagfuls of sugar + me.
---God seems to have a private number, which none of the nuns have put on speed dial. Since Sister Isabella claims that she does not own an address book, I suppose she must have it written down on a napkin, which has been sealed in a glass case complete with a little hammer and the message "break in case of emergency", but by this point Sister Isabella seemed to think I was insane and had stopped answering my questions.
...and the list is still growing. I have nothing against nuns, personally, but I do really wish she would just leave. *cough* Anyway, I hope this information was interesting enough for you, and that maybe you'll put some of it to good use. Which would be nice, since I know I'm never going to use any of the facts I managed to pick up today... In other news, I received a vacuum cleaner for Christmas and was delighted. Does that seem odd to you?
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no subject
Date: 2003-12-26 07:58 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-12-26 11:00 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-12-27 05:39 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-12-27 08:13 pm (UTC)(if you ignore the "dirt" and the "vacuum" part of this, it sounds like I'm talking about a car. o_O)
no subject
Date: 2003-12-28 07:40 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2003-12-28 09:20 am (UTC)